151. Amy Bugs Out
Amy decides to grab the scarab. Tickled pink that she has such a rare and interesting artifact, she is immediately seized by the need to lecture an invisible audience on the history of the scarab.
“Scarabs were sacred to the Ancient Egyptians,” she begins, “They're a kind of dung beetle, and the Egyptians believed that the actions of the dung beetle rolling a ball of dung down to its hole resembled the actions of their god Khepri, who represented the dawn and rolled the sun across the sky. They would often make ornate carvings of scarabs, like this one, as devotional objects or symbols of transformation. Indeed-”
Amy's pontification is interrupted by a strange buzzing sound. Amy looks puzzled and wanders the room, trying to find the source of the buzzing. She soon determines that it's coming from outside... And that it's getting louder. Amy then notices that the scarab in her hand is glowing, and its glow is getting brighter as the buzzing gets louder.
Amy has a sinking feeling that this is not going to end well for her.
At last the source of the buzzing is made apparent. A swarm of thousands of dung beetles bursts through the window, shattering it, and makes a beeline for Amy. It's all she can do to futilely try to cover her face with her arms as she's covered head-to-toe by a writhing mass of black beetles. Not a single scrap of Amy can be seen beneath the seething insectoid swarm.
After a few minutes, the swarm flies off, dissipating as quickly as it was formed. In its wake, a perfectly crafted statue of Amy composed entirely of dung. The statue still wears Amy's clothes, and, indeed, stands with arms at its sides, mouth agape, clearly shocked by this strange occurrence.
Not wishing to deal with the smell Amy now emits, the mansion's residents carefully strip the clothes from the dung statue and ship her down to New York City, where she is put on display at the Metropolitan Museum of Art as an example of a heretofore unknown variety of ancient Egyptian devotional dung statue.
Hey, Amy! What's brown and sounds like a bell?
DUNG!
Amy is in no condition to continue this adventure or her life.