39. Caught Flat
Amy decides the piano will provide more stability. She reaches out and latches on to the piano's rear leg...
Only to find that the piano, to avoid scuffing up the floor, has been carefully placed on tiny cloth mats, mats that are about as low-friction on this floor as Amy's socks. Amy is now flying across the floor, dragging a piano behind her. Fortunately, grabbing the piano has altered her trajectory so that she is now heading toward a wall rather than a glass window.
Amy winces as she slams into the wall. Her back explodes in pain, and she winces as she realizes that there's an altogether more painful impact about to occur when the piano hits. At that moment-
CRACK!
The leg she's holding breaks off, causing the piano to torque upward while still continuing its journey toward the wall. Amy's eyes widen as she contemplates the enormous piano that's about to slam her into the wall.
SPLAT!
The piano hits Amy and is now pressed flat against the wall. After much heaving, the pianist and some helpful guests are able to move the instrument. Behind it they find Amy, crushed flat against the wall, spread-eagle, face permanently fixed in an expression of dull surprise. Rather than scraping Amy off the wall, the owners decide to turn her into a little found-art exhibit, adding a little plaque:
“Amy Shaw: Portrait of a Professional Bimbo”
Amy is in no condition to continue this adventure or her life.